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Preparing kids for the future by helping them deal with divorce

If you are considering divorce, numerous factors can influence the decision. Perhaps you and your spouse have reached a point where moving in different directions seems to be the best option. The process can be stressful and daunting, especially if kids are involved.

If you have children, you may be wondering how the process will affect them. Kids are often resilient by nature, but such a major life change could be challenging for them to accept. There are certain measures you can take that might help them deal with the news of divorce with less difficulty.

Helping your children deal with divorce

When it comes to divorce, kids often have a tough time understanding and adjusting to new family arrangements. As a parent, you undoubtedly want to protect your child's present and future well-being, and there are several steps you can take to help with that:

  • Communicate with them:  Your child might find it hard to grasp the situation fully, but he or she may suffer more if left in the dark. Explaining the situation in a manner that your child can understand and keeping open lines of communication could help them open up about any issues they may be experiencing.
  • Provide reassurance:  Children may also believe that they are to blame for the divorce, or even feel as though they are no longer wanted, and offering reassurance can help them deal with these insecurities. Tell your kids that you and the other parent will never stop loving them, and that they are not the cause of the divorce.
  • Avoid involving them in parental disputes:  Although speaking with your former spouse might be difficult, it is important not to use your children as messengers. Limiting their involvement in your problems is a safe bet.
  • Watch what you say:  Divorce is a highly emotional process, and you and the other parent might be at odds, but speaking ill of him or her in front of the kids can be harmful in the short run and the long run.

Children may also need time to grieve before the healing process can begin. Watching over them during this period and getting additional professional help if necessary are effective ways to help shield them from harm.

Looking to the future

Your child's safety and emotional stability are extremely important to you, and you will likely want to negotiate a workable parenting plan that is not only in their best interests, but will allow them to grow and prosper throughout life. The process can be complex, and seeking assistance from someone with legal experience in child custody issues is an excellent idea.

By speaking with an family law attorney -- preferably one who is board-certified in family law -- you can have the legal guidance you need for the road ahead. A family law attorney can advise you on the crucial aspects of child custody, as well as other divorce topics, and assist you in pursuing the most favorable outcome possible for you and your kids.

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1925 Century Park East, Suite 1990
Los Angeles, CA 90067

Phone: 818-488-6423
Fax: (818) 832-7889
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